He was relentless. He sniffed around my “breast". I put that in quotations, because if you have been following along, you know what I really have is just a skin-pocket with a temporary water balloon. “Murph”’ I said with exasperation, “what the hell...stop it. That’s annoying”. Little did I know, Murphy, my 8 month old …
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I stood there, topless, ready to be photographed. “Welp, here goes nothing,” I thought as I looked at the person holding the camera. In fact, I was wearing only a cheap, disposable panty and a smirk. The shutter clicked away as I was told to hold a few different poses. “Okay. That should do it,” …
We need to break up. Look, it’s not you. it’s me. No, it is you. I CAN’T STAND YOU. When we hooked up last Jan.1, you sincerely seemed like you wanted to brighten my future. You were going to put my painful relationship with 2019 behind me. Turns out you were my rebound, and not …
The heavy, thick guitar lumbered through the truck's speakers as I soaked in the sludgey metal sounds coming from my son’s phone. I was giving him yet another ride to the ski resort where he is a tech in the rental shop. This was the 5th or bazillionth ride I have given him in the …
“The whole world is watching...the whole world is watching…” These were the words chanted by protesters at the 1968 Democratic National Convention in Chicago, in opposition to the Vietnam war. It started as many protests and marches do, peaceful yet loud. Then it wasn’t peaceful. The whole world was, indeed watching. This phrase has been …
CLICK. On goes the tattoo machine. The familiar buzzing sound fills my ears. “Are you ready?” I’m lying in a supine position, my left forearm at my side. Heartbreaker, my tattooer, gently takes my hand, positioning my arm just so. “I’m ready.” So, so ready, I think to myself. At this time a year ago, I …
BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ. It's my phone, but can’t get to it. It buzzes again. Then again. It goes unanswered. “Mom?” A distant voice calls out from upstairs. “MOM?!” It’s the patient. He is yelling out, as his efforts to reach me on the modern-day version of the ‘sick bell’ goes unanswered. I’m on my hands …
One year ago today, July 31, 2019, I sat across from the nurse, my husband gently holding my hand. I squeezed his fingers as we heard the news: I was diagnosed with breast cancer. More specifically Stage 3 Invasive Lobular Carcinoma. This is me today. Feeling strong on this one year cancerversary. More hair, less …
You probably know what a ‘noob’ is. But in case you don’t, it’s generally a term used to gently rag on someone who is new to something. New=Newbie=NOOB! For example:Question: Has anyone heard of this new video thingy called TikTok?Response: WHAT A NOOB! Why do I bring up noob? Well, because I have decided to …
They take our temperature and we go in. Wait, let me backup. We don’t BOTH go in, just me. My husband is asked to wait in the car until my blood is drawn. They tell him they will text when it’s time for me to see the doc. Welcome to the latest waiting room pandemic …
